


The Certified Zimmerman Experience

by Arebas



Category: Sanctuary (TV)
Genre: F/M, Humor, Massage mishaps, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-04
Updated: 2013-11-04
Packaged: 2017-12-31 10:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1030671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arebas/pseuds/Arebas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“How many girlfriends have you had, William? Because I can't imagine you surviving a relationship.”</p><p>Magnus has a situation that requires expert care. Unfortunately for her, Will makes helping her his mission in life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Certified Zimmerman Experience

“Have you seen Magnus?”

William kept asking the same thing to every resident in the Sanctuary he could find and they all responded with a negative. All but Henry who gave him a cryptic “Nope. But better this way. Trust me.” He, however, refused to elaborate.

Being honest, Will was getting worried. Magnus disappeared every now and then but the team hardly ever avoided her like this. Something was off. He kept looking for her, although he couldn't really remember what it was he needed his boss for at the moment. He just knew that something was going on with her and he hated being left out. He tried to remember if the date was some kind of anniversary for her. Ashley's death an birthday were not even close yet but she had three lifetimes worth of anniversaries so he couldn't be sure. He felt she might need him – though she probably didn't know it. She had the habit of retreating into herself when she felt she couldn't face a situation instead of asking out for help, which was what William felt he'd been hired for. To be there for her when she didn't want anyone around.

And that was why he boldly knocked on her private rooms' door. It wasn't that her bedroom was off limits, but it might as well have been. He understood. When your home is a refuge for anyone who might need it, you need to keep a place you can call your own.

The door opened and he found himself scanning Magnus' big blue eyes for any sign that would give her away. Whatever she was hiding from, he could help, he was sure of that.

“William” she said surprised.

The use of his given name didn't go unnoticed

“Magnus” - He said courtly.  
“What happened?” 

She sounded genuinely worried.

“Oh, nothing happened don't worry. I was just wondering... where you were” William realized he should have worked on his speech a little more but he had been too busy trying to imagine what she might have gotten into now to think of what he would tell her when he found her.

“Well, I am here. What did you need?”

She was still holding her door half opened, nothing in her body posture indicating he'd be welcomed inside the room.

“I... you know what? It's not important. I'll deal with it.” He said nonchalantly. But then he sounded serious when he asked “How are you doing? Do you need anything?”  
“I'm fine Will. If there's nothing else I...”

But he put his hand on her door so she wouldn't close it.

“Are you sure you're OK? Nothing I can help you with?”

Magnus huffed a little instead of giving him the smile he knew he would have gotten any other time for showing he cared.

“I'm fine. Just... go away.”

He stood, eyes wide open. That was new. Magnus was strong, independent and could be quite intimidating and, well, tough, but she was polite even in battle, of that he was sure.

“Go away?” he asked still in disbelief.

“Oh bloody hell. What do you want from me?”

William didn't know what he had done to irritate her so.

“Wow. Sorry Magnus. I didn't know I was interrupting... whatever it is you're doing in there. What are you doing?”

He saw her clench her jaw and press her lips together and he knew he was probably sticking his nose where it didn't belong. But he couldn't help himself.

“What I do in my bedroom is none of your damn business William.”

She didn't shout, she didn't even sound bothered. But it was the quiet calm of her wrath that scared him.

“God. You have company? Oh shit. Sorry. I didn't think... shit. Sorry!”

Magnus shook her head more annoyed than amused at his embarrassment.

“I am not entertaining anyone. At the moment.” She added that just to see him blush a deeper shade of red. “But if I were, that'd still be none of your business.”

“Yes. Of course. Your life. I won't even... God. Sorry.”

“It's fine. Just... shoo.” And she tried to close the door again but he used his hand to still it. “Good Lord, what now?” she asked rising her voice this time.

“Sorry.”  
“If you say 'sorry' one more time I shall cut your tongue”.

Will stared in stunned silence.

“Would that be all?” And, for the third time, tried to close her door – to find his hand pushing it open again.

“It's just that...” He didn't know how to phrase his worries in a way that wouldn't make her any angrier than she obviously already was. “... what's gotten into you?”

If looks could kill... Magnus wouldn't need to carry a gun.

“If you really must know,” she practically yelled at him “I'm having a really bad period. Satisfied?!”

It took William three full seconds to understand what she meant. Surely, she didn't mean she was going through some hard times. He had never thought of her in that way. He knew she was a woman but her period was not something he had ever considered. It made her very... human. It was unsettling to think of Magnus, an immortal being, in such mundane ways.

“At your age?”

The door did hit his nose when she slammed it on his face. He had had the good sense to jump back in anticipation though, so no real damage was done. He knew that was the worst thing he could have possibly said, but he only realized it after he'd heard himself say it.

“That went well.” He said to himself, rubbing his nose.

After a few moments, he knocked softly on her door again. Oh, she wouldn't open it, he knew that, but he had to apologize if he ever wanted her to talk to him again.

“Magnus? I didn't mean it like that. Look, I'm sorry. I really am.”

He waited a few seconds. Nothing.

“Magnus?”

He wondered whether he should stay or go. He knocked a second time.

“Magnus? Still there?”

Her voice came loud and clear from the other side of the door.

“For heaven's sake, do you think I can just vanish away from my bedroom?!”

He was making things worse. Other people would have the common sense to concede and go away but not him. He was stubborn as a mule when it came to righting wrongs. A trait that had never truly worked in his favor.

“I am sorry!”

“You've already said that. Several times. Do something about it William!”

Do something about it? That he could do. He tried the door knob and opened the door himself. She was curled in a ball on her bed, her arms wrapped tightly around her lower belly.

“What the hell?!” She exclaimed when she saw his face peeking over the opened door. “I meant go away not come in!”

“I know, I'm sorry. I just wanted to apologize. I didn't want you to think I was being insensitive with your feelings and...”

“Insensitive?!” She yelled getting up from her bed. “So you get into my room after I ask you to leave me alone?!”

“Yes. I can see how that would be a conflicting situation but...”

“Get the hell out of my room. NOW.”

And she didn't scream, which was again terribly frightening for Will.

“Magnus, you're not being...”

“What, rational?!” She was so close to him now that he seriously thought he had made a bad judgment call. She backed him up against the door frame. Whether she was getting ready to punch him or kick him out, he wasn't sure. He braced himself for either, just in case. She saw him flinch. 

“How many girlfriends have you had, William? Because I can't imagine you surviving a relationship.”

He had had his fair share of hormonal girlfriends and they did try to bite his head off from time to time, but he had always assumed that had more to do with their hormones than himself. Perhaps he'd been wrong.

“My girlfriends often thought I was very sensitive.”

Magnus rolled her eyes and huffed.

“Really! They loved my back rubs.”

She shook her head and put a hand on his chest to push him out of her room.

“Be a good boy now and leave me alone, will you?”

“Magnus, I can help. Let me help.”

Helen couldn't help but marvel at the young doctor's resolve to help even when it got him into so much trouble.

“It's quite alright, Will. You can't help me. Just go.”

“But I can!”

She would have enjoyed the conversation far more if she had not been cramping for as long as she'd been standing up. Realizing he was not going to give up, Magnus yielded and walked back to her bed.

“If the pills can't help, neither can you.” And she resumed her curled position, hoping her body heat and pressure would ease the pain.

“I wasn't lying. I do give the best back rubs”

He walked to her bed but as he stood right next to it, he became too aware of his surroundings. It was bad enough that he'd let himself into her room he wasn't going to sit on her bed uninvited.

“Sit on that chair and I will show you”  
“I have a physiotherapist for that, thank you”.  
“Well, he's not here now, is he? C'mon Magnus, let me help. I know I can make you feel better.”

“I appreciate it Will, really, but right now I don't want to move.” She closed her eyes and hoped he would overcome his good Samaritan personality and just leave. “No need to apologize or feel guilty or anything, just... go away and let me try to sleep it off. I've been having periods for centuries, I will survive.”

“Then lie on your stomach and I will do it here.”  
“You are most annoying, has anyone ever told you that?”

He waited by her bed but she didn't move.

“Roll over.” He ordered.

“I thought I was the boss here.”

“Well, right now I'm the doctor, so, roll over.”

She opened her eyes and saw his calm determination. Everything about him was relaxed and confident. He didn't look one bit like a man who is thinking whether or not to do as he's been told. She could see a bit of herself in him. She was the first one to seek out and help anyone who seemed in trouble – whether her help was wanted or not. She had considered it a virtue but being on the receiving end of the action she realized maybe it wasn't such a good trait after all. It was extremely annoying. Still, the spams were killing her and she could feel the muscles in her back tighten harder with each cramp. A massage would probably help. She rolled over on her stomach with a sigh.

“Hurt me and you're fired”.

Will chuckled at that.

“I was not joking, you cheeky bugger.”

“Yeah, well, can I sit on your bed?”

“NOW you ask for permission?”

He ignored her and sat next to her over his bent leg. He knew the position was going to be uncomfortable as hell but straddling her legs was simply out of the question.

He leaned over her and put both palms open over her lower back. Magnus felt the heat from his hands and its warmth was already soothing. He kept them there for a few seconds before he began to add pressure with his fingers.

“This feels nice, I’ll give you that” She said, her voice muffled a little by the bed covers.

“I had a 100% satisfaction rate”

“Don't doubt it.”

“You won't get the certified Zimmerman experience though, shame.”

“Why not?” She asked somewhat disappointed.

“Well, for starters, I give those naked.”  
“That's not going to happen.”

“I figured that much” he said smiling at her lighter and more relaxed tone. The massage was already working.

They both remained silent for the next short minutes while Will worked hard on her sore muscles. He rubbed harder where he felt a knot but kept it soft enough not to add any extra strain to her back. He knew it would be mostly the warmth of his touch what would ease the pain anyway but he imagined the added rubbing would not be unwelcome. He felt her relax under his touch, her breathing slowing down and her posture softening. He was distracted as he began to feel his own back hurt at the forced position when she suddenly started talking again.

“I don't have any ova left.”

The revelation caught him by surprise and he wasn't sure of what to make out of it.

“Sorry?”

“I've used up all my eggs. But my cycle keeps running. The Source Blood maintains my hormonal balance steady as it does with the rest of my metabolism but it can't replace the eggs I have already lost.”

He wasn't sure why she was sharing this information with him. Was she sorry she had lost her reproductive window or was she annoyed by the fact that she'd still have to endure her periods even though there was no reason for them anymore?

“Does it bother you?”

“Not really.”

“Oh.” Clueless.

Magnus realized he had not been following her train of thought so she felt like clarifying her statement.

“You were surprised that I was still menstruating.”

“Ah, right”

“At My Age.”

“Yes, yes, I know. Sorry”.

She smiled against the bed covers. Being over 250 years old, age wasn't something she gave much thought about, but old habits die hard and it was difficult not to feel personally offended when it was implied that she was old. Even if she was. Besides, the cheeky monkey had some nerve.

“Being eternally young and beautiful had to have its disadvantages too, I guess.”

The line was his attempt at fixing the age mishap. He was subtle, she couldn't deny that. She considered torturing him a little for being so nosy by starting a lengthy conversation about periods but the truth was he had been right about the massage: It was doing wonders to her aching body.

“Magnus?”

She hummed in response. 

“I am ruining your blouse. A lot. What is this fabric? Whatever it is, I am destroying it.”

“Oh William, honestly!”

“What do you want me to do? I can stop or you can take it off.”

Magnus chuckled amused.

“I might look 'eternally young and beautiful' but I wasn't born yesterday.”

“I'm not coming on to you, I promise. I really am making a mess with your blouse. I can go on if you want but don't blame me when you see what's happened to it.”

“Will, I've had 'terrible knots on the lacing of my corsets' and 'awful stains' on my skirts. I've had dresses that lost a ribbon or a button or a pin. There were bras that 'cut my circulation' and garters that 'looked very uncomfortable' and all sorts of items I've had to take off with the purest of intentions. You don't ask a woman to take off her shirt for her own good unless you're her doctor and she needs heart surgery.”

He had kept his hands on her back all the while and Magnus felt suddenly cold when he removed them. She felt him shift his position on her bed and opened her eyes to find him hovering close to her face. He was holding something for her to see.

“Alright you woman of the world, but this got tangled in my watch and it sorta came off.”

He was holding what could very well be a tear of her silk blouse.

“You beast!”

And she reached behind her back to try and feel where it had been torn. Her blouse had tiny straps sewed on the back on a crisscross pattern that she had liked cause it had reminded her of the lacing of her old dresses. She figured one would be missing though she couldn't really feel it.

“Sorry! I am not used to deal with all these frilly things”

“Your girlfriends didn't have decent clothes?” She said as she gave up feeling her blouse, the posture adding to the pain in her back.

“It was mostly T-shirts. And well, they were usually...”

“Naked, I know.” she finished for him. “Damn. I've pulled a muscle now. So much for the Zimmerman experience.”

William felt bad. It seemed no matter how hard he tried, he kept making matters worse. But he was a man on a mission, he would make her feel better or perish in the attempt – something that he feared might not be so far off if he kept screwing this up. He was sure Magnus kept several weapons concealed in her bedroom. Not to mention that he was positive she could kill him with her own hands if she needed to.

“Let me see...” and his hands were on her again, precisely kneading over the one muscle she had over worked. She yelped.

“Bloody hell, William!”

“Sorry!”

“You're fired.”

He stopped rubbing.

“What?”

“I said if you hurt me you'd get sacked. So there you have it.”

He was sure she wasn't serious but she surely sounded like she was.

“Oh c'mon! You're “bullets and leather Magnus” that couldn't hurt so bad!”

She shifted to try and look at him.

“What did you just call me?” 

This wasn't his finest, he could see it now.

“Magnus... just... relax, OK? I will make it better.”

“How can I relax? When you're not tearing off my clothes you're hurting me!”

“You make it sound like I'm attacking you.” William winced.

“Well, I was doing fine before you came to my rescue, you know?”

He could see her point. He might have overstepped on his duties as a protegé and friend and employe. Specially the employe part. But he could fix it. That was just who he was.

“Let me do it right. I promise you will feel better if you just let me do this.”

Magnus sighed in defeat. The massage had felt wonderful right until he had screwed it up. And now she did have a pinched muscle that was screaming for attention.

“Fine.”

“So, take off your blouse.”

The man had some nerve.

“William, really!”

“I'm not going to get tangled again in these things and have you fire me for good! You can sew this one back but I doubt you'd appreciate having to mend the whole thing. C'mon Magnus, I am a doctor, you know? Nothing there I haven't already seen.” 

She sighed again, quite loudly. The man's need to help was infuriating. But she did yearn for the massage now. And deep in her mind she knew he was being honest with his proposal. He offered a massage and that's how far he would go with it. Not to say men were men and they all enjoyed the eye candy they were given. Still, she wouldn't lose a thing.

“You're like a dog with a bone.”

She rolled to her side and then knelt on her bed.

“Well, turn around.”

He found that somewhat silly, considering he would have to see her exposed back in a few moments but spun around to sit on her bed, facing the other side of the room when she began unbuttoning her blouse. She slid it off her shoulders and checked the damages on its back.

“Magnus.”

“Oh dear god, what now?”

“You have a mirror in your vanity.” He said pointing at her reflection. A half naked Magnus glared back from the polished glass.

“You could have just closed your eyes.”

“Sorry.” He said and closed them.

“Oh what's the point now, Will? Just finish what you've started so I can go on with my day. You're really getting on my nerves and I can assure you that's not the hormones talking.” She threw the blouse over the feet of her ample bed and laid down on it again. Soon she felt William moving closer to her.

He had one leg hovering above hers in his attempt to straddle her when she simply said “Don't even think about it.” he stopped midair and knelt by her side.

He was about to complain about how his back would hurt when he was done but she also cut him before he could open his mouth.

“One more word and I kick you out William. I mean it.”

He had the feeling that she really would. Even he could see how he had pushed things a little too far. He began to work on her sore muscles instead, if he could at least get out of this with her gratitude not everything would be lost.

He was surprised when he managed to keep silent for quite a long time. There was some occasional humming of a song that had been stuck into his head since he woke up in the morning but he knew Magnus would not find that offensive. He was rather pleased with himself when he felt her muscle tone softening again, her breathing deepening. He rubbed and kneaded with finger pads and knuckles. Then spread his hands wide on her bare back and let his body heat sooth her. He put his body weight on the heels of his hands and heard her vertebrae snap.

He jumped back, afraid he might have hurt her again, but she moaned low.

“You OK?” he asked.

“Mmmm. Keep going.”

So he repeated the action moving up on her spine. It cracked on different places and each time Magnus moaned in satisfaction. William grinned, finally something he was doing right! So he began to rub her neck and shoulders. He did pressure circles over her shoulder blades and dug his fingers deeper on the muscles down her spine. When he reached the middle of her back on his way down he rubbed her through the elastic band of her bra. He could see that it was tight and it did look uncomfortable, but knew better than to comment on it. So he massaged her over it and around it and hummed a little louder so he wouldn't risk opening his mouth.

Magnus was fully aware of his hesitation and smiled when he moved away from it, lower on her back. She was gladly surprised when he didn't make any suggestion about how more comfortable she'd be without it. And she probably would. Feeling his hands all over her skin made her very aware of the portion of skin that was not receiving the same attention and how tight the garment felt. Lying down on her stomach wasn't making things any easier on her tender breasts now either.

She shifted and wriggled a little trying to accommodate herself and then she felt him stop.

“Erm... Magnus”

She sighed. And he had been doing so well so far...

“No, you cannot remove my bra”.

“That's not what...”  
“And you can't just unfasten it either.”  
“But Magnus I have..”  
“I am not taking it off, Will.”

She felt him tug lightly at it.

“What are you doing now?!”

“Magnus now I know why I ripped your blouse.”

“Because you're a pervert and can't control yourself? I have a gun under my pillow, don't tempt me.”

“Ha, ha, very funny. My watchband is broken. I am stuck on your bra.”

“Good lord William, I don't know how any of your girlfriends survived the Zimmerman Experience, honestly.”

“I wasn't wearing...”  
“...your watch. Yes, I know. Please, do try to get yourself free without tearing it too. It may come as a shock to you but I don't usually enjoy having my clothes ripped off.”

She felt him tug and wriggle and pull his hand trying to get it unstuck. She heard a faint snapping noise and then Will went very still.

“You tore it, didn't you.” It didn't even sound like a question.

“It's all this lace! I think I broke one of these, what are they? Flowers with wings.” He leaned for a closer inspection “Leaves. Weird as they seem. Who designs these things, really? I don't think I can set it free. I will have to pull and just tear it...”

But Magnus was already working on the clasp behind her back.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh, now you're coy?!”

She unclasped it and lifted up her torso from the bed.

“Work with me. Eyes closed.”

She slid the straps from her shoulders and Will's arm followed her movements while she removed her bra so he wouldn't pull on it.

“Now give me your hand and I'll take off your watch.”

He was looming stretched alongside her body, eyes closed, and Magnus took his arm and unfastened his watch.

Will felt it slip from his wrist. “You decent? Can I open my eyes now?”

Magnus was supporting her weight on her elbows while trying to disentangle his watch from the lace. “Give me a second.” Her back hurt again at the forced stretch and her breasts felt too heavy. “Ugh, I can't.” She let herself fall flat against the mattress and threw the bra and the watch back at him.

William opened his eyes when he felt the fabric touch his face.

He picked both items and sat up again next to her.

“Let me.”

He worked his way around the delicate fabric, turning and twisting it around the little piece of metal that had become lose on his watch. Magnus looked at him over her shoulder and seeing him so focused on the task at hand she moved her arms closer to her body and added pressure on the sides, trying to alleviate the weight on her breasts. Taking off her bra had both felt like a relief and a bother. Without giving it much thought she pushed her hands under her body and lifted herself slightly on her elbows while she massaged her aching breasts.

William had managed to separate metal from lace and turned to Magnus victorious, only to find her with her head hung down and her hands busy fondling herself. He looked away quickly and focused on the garment on his hands. Her bra was still warm from the close contact to her body and he felt himself getting uncomfortable.

“I got it.” He said, lifting her bra over his shoulder so she could see it without him having to turn around to face her. “I will leave it here and let you rest or... whatever.”

He let the bra hang from the foot of her bed and was contemplating whether to wear his watch or fix it first when she spoke.

“Actually... could you just...? The bra was indeed cutting on my skin and, it's off now so...”

He turned around slowly and saw her looking at him over her shoulder, her arms safely tuck on both sides of her body blocking anything other than her bare back.

“Sure” and he gave her a smile that came out twitchy. Magnus replied with a knowing smile of her own.

There were too red lines marked on her skin and they did look painful. Will followed them lightly with his fingers and Helen sighed content. He smiled, a genuine smile this time at her relief and then rubbed them harder.

He went up and down her back again, rubbing and kneading and then simply caressing her skin. He had managed to keep a very clinical approach to the massage until then and he realized that he was now enjoying the touch of her skin a little too much. He figured it was time to stop but Magnus chose that very moment to moan softly and stretch herself on the bed. He tried really hard not to look at the swell of her breast, pressed tightly against the mattress, but he simply couldn't help himself. His eyes had a mind of their own.

“Thank you. I don't think I said before.”

He coughed a little. “No problem. Glad I can help.”

She hummed again and he thought he could keep it together for a few more minutes now that she was finally enjoying it. He'd just have to keep his mind away from the feeling of her skin on his fingers and his eyes away from the curve of her breast. Easy.

“I don't know how you can wear these things. They look really uncomfortable.” And he traced the marks on her back that were now starting to fade.

“Because not wearing them can sometimes be more uncomfortable.”

“Oh.”

“It's not that bad. It's like taking off a pair of socks that were too tight after wearing them all day.”

“Really?”

“Actually, no.”

“Ah.”

And she hummed softly again and Will grinned. He spread his hands over her lower back and pushed his weight on her again. Nothing cracked this time but she made a soft keening sound of approval that made him swell with pride and encouraged him to continue. Yep, the Zimmerman Experience never failed him. He was distracted checking the little freckles that doted her back when he reached her middle and his hands spanned over her back, his fingers making contact with the very soft and warm skin of the side of her breasts. He removed his hands immediately. He felt both guilty and aroused at the accidental touch.

She had tensed up again but had not moved.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... you know.”

“It's alright Will.”

But she placed her arms back securely to her sides. He patted her back awkwardly a couple of times. “I think my job here is done. One Zimmerman experience ready to go.”

“Yes, thank you again. It did help.”

Truth was it had, the pain was now more than bearable. The only inconvenience was that now she was feeling rather horny. His touch, as unplanned and quick as it had been, had felt far too good. She was ashamed to admit that had it not been an accident, had he done it on purpose, she would have let him get away with it and hope he'd try to feel her up again.

And that would have been a terrible idea.

“Yes, well, I go now.”

It was all getting very awkward very fast. She reached for her discarded blouse and covered herself with it as she sat up on the bed.

“Will.”

He turned to looked at her. She kept her eyes on his and held her hand out for him to hold. He did without hesitation.

“It's OK Honestly. And I am truly grateful for your care.”

“Oh c'mon guys!” They both turned to look at a very distraught Henry. He was covering his face with his elbow, his hand closed tightly over his tablet. “That's why we have doors, you know! To close them so we don't scar the rest of the people living here!”

“But Henry...!” Magnus said amused.

The young tech just spun on his heels and shot for the door. Will gave Magnus a worried look before shouting at Henry as he hurriedly left the room, “Henry we weren't doing anything!” 

Henry even closed the door on his way out and William almost crashed with it on his pursuit to Magnus amusement. 

"Henry!"

“Man, that's my mom!”

It warmed her heart to hear him say that, even if it was while he ran away from her down a corridor. She giggled at the absurdity of the situation and keeping the blouse to her chest, walked to close her bedroom door. She had but one bother now and she figured it could be easily solved in a warm shower and god forbid she'd scar any more Sanctuary residents!

**Author's Note:**

> I was supossed to be writing my novel for Nanowrimo but wrote +5000 words of random pointless silly Magnus fic instead. Ha ha... go me. *waves tiny wee little flag* So hopeless.


End file.
